Scoop in the Loop

By Bethany Reinhart

Just when you thought it couldn’t get any weirder, last week now former Gov. Rod Blagojevich decided to boycott his historic impeachment trial in Springfield, Ill., and instead went on a whirlwind media tour, only to change course and return to Springfield on the final day of the trial to give his “closing argument.”

It was a bizarre ending to the fascinating and appalling story that got much more national attention than it probably deserved. But it was kind of like passing a car wreck-you couldn’t help but look.

I remember the day Blagojevich was arrested, way back on Dec. 9, and watching U.S. Attorney Patrick Fitzgerald describe the allegations against him in a press conference. I thought to myself that, surely, he would be resigning within days. It’s the only thing left for him to do. But I underestimated this former boxer-he’s scrappy. He was in it for the longhaul.

On Jan. 26, the day his historic impeachment trial began, where was our scandalized governor? In Springfield to defend himself and answer questions about the charges against him? Of course not, that would be logical. Instead, he was giving a press conference to kick off his media blitz.

In this first wacky appearance, he compared himself to a cowboy from the Old West who was wrongly accused of stealing horses. Then he compared the impeachment trial to being hanged for stealing horses because he was not allowed to call fellow cowboys as witnesses to defend him.

“They’re just hanging me,” he protested.

Because, obviously, Blago is the victim here, right? It’s his rights that are being violated? Not the residents of Illinois whose senate seat he tried to sell and who were essentially being held hostage for nearly two months by a megalomaniacal governor run amok?

One of the many charges against him was trying to “sell” President Barack Obama’s vacant senate seat to the highest bidder. Under the circumstances, who would have expected that he would have the nerve to actually go ahead and appoint a senator after those tapes came out? But that’s exactly what he did when he appointed Roland Burris.

Then came the talk show appearances on “The Today Show,” “Good Morning America,” “The View,” “Larry King Live” and “The Rachael Maddow Show,” where he kept repeating the same old complaints-no witnesses, the truth will come out, they just want me out of the way so they can raise taxes, I love to help old people, I was elected twice by the people (an unfortunate fact), blah, blah, blah.

In some of the many memorable/ridiculous highlights from his interviews, Blagojevich had the gaul to compare his situation to the imprisonment of Gandhi, Nelson Mandela and Martin Luther King Jr. He also told Diane Sawyer he considered Oprah Winfrey for the senate seat and essentially admitted his guilt to Rachel Maddow in trying to get members of the editorial board of the Chicago Tribune fired.

Finally, Blagojevich changed his mind and returned, with his ego inflated as ever, to Springfield on Jan. 29 where he made his final argument to the senate. It wasn’t enough, though-they voted unanimously to remove him from office and also banned him from ever holding public office in Illinois again.

But the shame that should come along with being kicked out of office in a 59-0 vote, with even his former political allies like Senator Emil Jones voting against him, didn’t keep our ex-governor away from the cameras. He gave a little “farewell address” outside his Ravenswood Manor home the evening after he was given his walking papers.

Maybe old Rod isn’t as crazy as we think he is. Maybe this whole sideshow he’s created around him has actually been a cleverly planned diversion-one designed to help him gain sympathy from potential jurors in his impending criminal case. All it takes is one uncertain juror to keep him from joining his predecessor, former Gov. George Ryan, in prison.

On the bright side, if there is one, at least he gave us all something to laugh about. With former president George W. Bush back in Texas and Sarah Palin back in Alaska keeping an eye on Russia for us, we need some political figure to keep us entertained-and Blagojevich has done just that. The hair, the jogging tights, the foul language and the sheer, brazen audacity of the man have led to many hysterical parodies and given late-night comedians something to joke about.

His 15 minutes will be over soon, and hopefully he’ll be stamping our license plates in no time, but at least he knows how to make a dramatic exit.